It’s a cooking blog redone. Why? Because I’ve been working for over 12 hours and I’m not done.
Yes, folks. I’m dialing it in. My apologies!
So, I am a bit down lately, mostly because:
- I am a writer
- I live in the U.S.
I gave up and am giving you all this – the Black Bean Soup that Reflects the State of My Inner Soul Right This Second Because I am DIRE.
Black Bean Soup Because The World Sucks
Sometimes the world sucks and you need a dark soup to match your feelings. Am I right?
This is a new version of a black bean soup I wrote about before. You can never have enough black bean soup recipes. Can you?
- 3 tbsp olive or vegetable oil
- 2 whole onions (chopped)
- 6 whole garlic cloves (chopped/pressed)
- 3 ribs celery (chopped)
- 1 whole carrot (chopped)
- 5 tsp cumin
- .5 tsp red pepper flakes or hot sauce (to taste really)
- 60 oz black beans (canned, drained)
- 2 tsp lime juice
- .5 cup cilantro (optional, to taste)
Heatolive oil in soup pot over medium heat.
Stare at it until it shimmers.
Remember when you used to shimmer.
Throw in the onions, celery and carrot.
Sigh again because honestly? What is the point.
Put in salt, blood pressure be damned.
Stir once in awhile. Eventually the vegetable will get soft.
“Eventually” is 10 to 15 minutes. This is a much shorter ‘eventually’ than when waiting for your editor to return your email. But whatever.
Add in the smelly things – garlic, cumin and red pepper flakes.
Wonder if you’re a smelly thing? When did you last bathe? Was it before 2018? Join the club.
Cook until things smell more than you do – 30 seconds.
It’s time for the dark soul part of this soup. You are miserable, aren’t you? Yes, writer you are.
Add beans. Add broth.
Put the heat on medium high and watch it simmer. Reduce it so it only simmers gently. If only YOU were simmering gently, but honestly? The state of the world makes you SIMMER INTO ROARING, doesn’t it? Yes. Yes. It does.
Soup is not you though. So simmer GENTLY for 30 minutes, or else it will boil over and stick to the pot and believe me, you do not have the emotional reserves to deal with that mess.
Put about 4 cups into a blender (make sure not to overload your blender because it is hot and you will get burned and you probably don’t have the medical insurance to deal with that if you are an American writer).
You can also use a hot-pink immersion blender if you are tired of the darkness of this soup, your soul, and this world.
JUST BE CAREFUL!
Put the blended stuff back in the soup pot. Mix. Add in cilantro, lime juice, salt and pepper.
Man Verdict – It tastes sad.
Dog Verdict – Isn’t this not good for dogs?
My Verdict – Yep. Uh-huh.
The last TIME STOPPERS BOOK is out and I love it. You should buy it because it’s empowering and about friendship and bias and magic. Plus, dragons and elves.
How to Get Signed Copies:
If you would like to purchase signed copies of my books, you can do so through the awesome Sherman’s Book Store in Bar Harbor, Maine or the amazing Briar Patch. The books are also available online at places like Amazon and Barnes & Noble.
For signed copies – email email@example.com for Sherman’s or email firstname.lastname@example.org let them know the titles in which you are interested. There’s sometimes a waiting list, but they are the best option. Plus, you’re supporting an adorable local bookstore run by some really wonderful humans. But here’s the Amazon link, too!
You can buy prints of my art here. Thank you so much for supporting my books and me and each other. I hope you have an amazing day.
A new episode of Dogs are Smarter Than People, the quirky podcast with writing tips, life tips and a random thought came out yesterday! Check it out, like and subscribe!