Microwave Raspberry Sauce of Wordle and Wine

funny recipes

Sometimes you just need fruit and sugar. Okay. What am I saying? All the time you just need fruit and sugar.

Raspberry My Sauce

Recipe by CarrieCourse: sauceCuisine: americanDifficulty: Easy

Are you addicted to wine, raspberries, sugar, or Wordle? Do you have a microwave? This recipe is for you, baby.

Stuff That Goes In It

  • 2 cups raspberries

  • ⅓ cup sugar

How to Make It

  • Prepare to stain your fingers red. Prepare to have to go to the door even in a pandemic so that you can sign the FED EX driver’s thing to prove you are over 21 so that you can get an entire box of wine off the internet. Watch the Fed Ex driver judge you.
  • Okay. Here’s the recipe. Sorry about that. It was a low point recently. Another low point? Constantly checking when the next Wordle game was up and seeing gray, yellow, and green squares in my dreams.
  • Swear off the Wordle addiction and get a big container (2 quarts) and put the raspberries and sugar into it. Wonder if ‘swear’ would be a good five-letter word for Wordle. NO! DO NOT THINK ABOUT IT!
  • Put plastic wrap over the container (too many letters) and put it in the microwave (way too many letters).
  • Cook for three minutes.
  • Uncover it. Stir it. Realize you should have offered the Fed Ex driver some wine. Feel guilty.
  • Cook another minute. Think about winning Wordle and wine.
  • If you are anti-seed (let’s face it, most of us are), put the raspberries through a sieve. Wonder if you should use ‘sieve’ in Wordle. Realize no. More than one E in that baby. Wonder if the Fed Ex driver plays Wordle.
  • Keep the strained sauce. Do not keep the seeds or go running after the Fed Ex driver with your bottle of wine yelling, “WORDLE! WORDLE!” That would be too weird.
  • Eat that sauce. Get it all over your face. Trust me and do not answer the door if someone comes, not without cleaning your teeth first. Raspberries make you look like you’ve turned zombie. Not a good look. Even in a pandemic.


  • This was adapted from the Fanny Farmer Cookbook by Marion Cunningham. It’s a big, awesome cookbook, one of my first and I love it with all my little Wordle heart. HEART! That has five letters!

Author: carriejonesbooks

I am the NYT and internationally-bestselling author of children's books, which include the NEED series, FLYING series, TIME STOPPERS series, DEAR BULLY and other books. I like hedgehogs and puppies and warm places. I have none of these things in my life.

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