Forced Rhyme Moments
I was recently helping a poet/author who was worried about forced rhyme moments and then she realized she wasn’t absolutely sure what ‘forced rhyme’ even met.
So, here’s a bit of rundown on ways we can all force our rhymes.
Weird Phrasing.
The most common way picture book editors balk at forced rhymes is when the author rearranges the phrase or sentence so that the rhyme comes at the end but the whole thing sounds unnatural. Like this:
Whenever we go out for a run,
With you, I like the sun.
Look at me! I’m unnatural.
Normally, it would be in natural conversational U.S. English:
Whenever we go out for a run,
I like the sun.
The ‘with you’ wouldn’t even be there because of the ‘we.’ We just shove that on to make it rhyme, which is why we call it forced. J I love imagining all of us poet-people brandishing our mugs of tea and pens and screaming, “Rhyme, damn it! I force you!”
Random bits
The other big thing that happens in picture books is we stick random information into the story just to make a rhyme.
I like manatees. I think they’re great.
My aunt got sick from a tomato she ate.
This is pretty cute, actually.
So, if the rest of the book was about manatees, then that line about the aunt wouldn’t make sense, right? That’s another example of a forced rhyme.
Making a Big Long Line
I did this so much when I was young and I still have to hold my typing hands back because it’s what I ALWAYS WANT TO DO. I would make a really big line to get a rhyme in.
I was working over at the Dairy Joy,
Just minding my own business, scooping the scoops, when I finally scoped out this boy.
Most of my grade-school poems were about being in love with random imaginary humans
Anyway, if the rest of the couplets are short, then this looks silly and forced.
Almost But Not Quite
Another big thing people do is the almost but not quite there rhyme. They call this a slant rhyme or a half rhyme. Poets actually use this on purpose all the time. Here’s an example that I pasted from the web. It’s a poem called “To My Wife” by George Wolff
If love is like a bridge
George Wolff
or maybe like a grudge,
and time is like a river
that kills us with a shiver,
then what have all these mornings meant
but aging into love?
What now is straight must have been bent;
what now is whole must have been rent.
My hand is now your glove.”
Wrenched rhymes
This happens when the words rhyme, but different syllables are stressed like here where the stress goes on the first syllable of laughing so on the laugh and not on the ing:
I was laughing
On the swing.
Random pretend poem
So, there you go. A tiny little lesson (Lesson? It sounds so formal!) about forced rhymes. Remember force is not cool. Talk to your poems, chill with them, let them decide to hang out with you.
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