Eight Sexy Ways to Write Sexy
Carrie’s been editing a lot of erotica lately and despite her uptight New England ways, we thought it was time to give you all a few hints about writing sex scenes.
Gasp!
I know! I know! Here we go…
Hint #1
It needs to make sense.
We’ve all seen really un-sexy writing, right? You’re reading the passage and they are in a kitchen in a house in Wyoming and doing it on the counter and then—poof—they are in four-some on some beach in Belize.
And you’re reading this and you go, “What the what?”
The sexy parts doesn’t matter because the rest doesn’t make any sense.
Hint #2
Don’t make it vanilla.
Most readers aren’t reading because they want to hear about the same old missionary sex that they’ve been doing with their own partners for the last thirty-two years.
We read books to experience new things.
We read books to live out fantasies we might never have in our own life.
We read books to feel like characters who aren’t us, to empathize, learn, and discover.
We read books to get what we can’t always get in real life.
So make it hot.
Hint #3
Make your character interesting and not just um… someone who is having sex, rutting in various places.
Hint #4
Be into it.
No matter what your personal feelings are about sex, you want to write about it like you’re really into it. You want those endorphins to be out there on the page. You can be male, female, agender, gender nonconforming, gay, straight or pan to write sex. You can be any race or religion or ethnicity or social class to write sex.
Sex is pretty much a thing that a lot of adults do. That’s why we have babies and the species hasn’t died off.
Anyone who tells you that one demographic is better than the other at it? They’re being a bigoted punk. Don’t be a bigoted punk.
Hint #5
Show It. Don’t Tell It.
It’s all about the details. Fornicating is the point in erotic fiction, right? But it’s all in the details.
You read, “Two people have sex” and you think, “Yeah. Okay? Whatever.”
That’s telling, right? And it has no details and it’s super boring—so boring!
We want our characters to have dimension, to be human or vampire or zombie, but detailed. We want to root for them or cry for them or cheer for them when they scream, “Boo-yah!” into the bedroom when they’re done.
Hint #6
Dialogue is your friend.
Teasing, the promise, the verbal foreplay? It makes the actual act way more worth it.
You can be silly. You can be creative. You can be naughty. You can use a double entendre (say one thing, mean sex) and have fun.
Hint #7
Have fun. Just like in real life. Fornication can be funny. Use that.
Shaun’s Hint #8
If there’s any doubt, try it out.
WRITING TIP OF THE POD
All the hints.
DOG TIP FOR LIFE
Do your research. Pound the streets. Watch other species. Know what you’re writing about.
SHOUT OUT!
The music we’ve clipped and shortened in this podcast is awesome and is made available through the Creative Commons License.
Here’s a link to that and the artist’s website. Who is this artist and what is this song? It’s “Summer Spliff” by Broke For Free.
WE HAVE EXTRA CONTENT ALL ABOUT LIVING HAPPY OVER HERE! It’s pretty awesome.
AND we have a writing tips podcast called WRITE BETTER NOW! It’s taking a bit of a hiatus, but there are a ton of tips over there.
We have a podcast, LOVING THE STRANGE, which we stream biweekly live on Carrie’s Facebook and Twitter and YouTube on Fridays. Her Facebook and Twitter handles are all carriejonesbooks or carriejonesbook. But she also has extra cool content focused on writing tips here.
Carrie is reading one of her raw poems every once in awhile on CARRIE DOES POEMS. And there you go! Whew! That’s a lot!
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I’ve worked with Carrie on multiple novels and she is a wonderful mentor! She is a great teacher and provides excellent feedback with examples, allowing me to learn and grow as a writer. She usually responds with feedback quicker than the agreed time, which is always nice. The best thing about Carrie though is that she is so encouraging. Sometimes it’s hard to have your work critiqued, but Carrie makes it easy. She is so good at heaping on praise while also giving constructive feedback, so it makes you excited to revise, rather than want to give up. I highly recommend her!
Jason Gallaher, author of WHOBERT WHOVER, OWL DETECTIVE
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Carrie is the writing coach I always dreamed of having. She has such a great balance in her feedback between singing your praises at what is working and giving you honest criticism at what still needs development. Carrie goes above and beyond in her editorial letters, giving very clear and detailed feedback, and her eagerness to answer any questions makes the whole experience of critique—which can be a very vulnerable experience—make you feel like you’re with a trusted friend that you’ve known for years (even though you just met).
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Gentle Encouragement and an Occasional Kick in the Pants
One of the things I enjoyed the most about working with Carrie is that she helped me write the book I wanted to write, not the book she would have preferred I write, or the book she would written in my place. She was vested in helping me express my vision as a writer and as a human being.
One special thing about Carrie as a writing coach and teacher is her understanding of writing psychology. She’s well familiar with the pits of uncertainty and the swamps of despondency a writer can step into, and seems to know just the right thing to say to get the struggling person going again, from gentle encouragement to straight-ahead course correction to even the occasional kick in the pants.
Lauren Haynes
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It is a blessing Carrie is willing to share her insights and talents with others, because she is a powerhouse of a coach who pushes you to be the best writer you can be. There were times where I was so frustrated with my novel I felt like quitting, and Carrie pulled me from the bog of eternal revisions and dead-ends into a place of hope. She invigorated me to write and write better. Carrie inspired my growth as a writer and a person. She showed me it’s okay (actually, it’s great) to embrace my quirkiness. She tore down walls I didn’t know I had built and gave me the foundation to be a confident writer with direction.
Her feedback centers on developing your authentic voice. She doesn’t try to make you write like anyone else and applauds your uniqueness. She encourages you to push boundaries and explore the soul of your story. She is extremely attentive to character development and plot structure, as well as how those elements resonate with the intended audience and reveal the author’s purpose. She celebrates powerful writing with specific feedback on what works and why it works just as often as she advises on revisions to improve the story. She asks meaningful questions, offers clear examples, and supplies diverse resources to provoke the author to transform their stories in ways they may never have otherwise. She has an innate sense of the heart of a story and digs into its core as if the writing were her own.
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Wendi Kepplinger
Shrinks Fear
Carrie has a gift of encouragement in its truest sense–she searches for what is good in a writer and grows it, she provides perspective that shrinks fear back to size, and she nourishes the kind of confidence and hope so vital for a creative work. Even her criticism is gently done. She is also unfailingly funny! Her comments keep discussions fun and light and create a safe space for people to share and grow. It is clear that she cares and wants our books to succeed.
Trista Wilson
A Light for Other Writers
When working with Carrie, I can feel that she is genuinely invested in helping me make my writing the very best it can be. She freely shares her own writing experiences, including the struggles, which helps me not feel alone in those tough moments. She is so positive and encouraging while also giving very specific and thoughtful feedback to help my writing shine. Carrie is truly a light for other writers.
