Hard boil the eggs. Feel positive. You've got this.
Peel the eggs.
Cut the eggs in half.
Worry about the eggs. It must be hard to be boiled, peeled, and cut in half. It feels like having your book reviewed.
Sip it like the writer you are and DO NOT CHUG it because some random reviewer is probably watching right now and judging.
Be thankful that there aren't life reviewers.
Remember to be grateful that there are book reviewers because even if they hated your book that's okay. It means one other person beside your mom actually read the book.
Toast book reviewers.
Continue cooking. Scoop out the yolks. Mash those yolks and then add mayo and mustard.
Season it. Think of how you can use these stuffed eggs as an objective correlative of your life.
Decide against that. Drink another sip. REMEMBER NOT TO GUZZLE!
Season the yolk mixture. Put it inside the white part of the eggs' empty cavity. Look at you replacing what was lost and making things better and tastier. Feel proud writer.
Cut tomatoes in half. Be careful because you've had wine and now you're using a knife.
Put each tomato half on top of a tiny piece of lettuce.
It looks so pretty! EAT THEM ALL! DO NOT SHARE! You deserve it writer, plus low carbs. WIN!
I am the NYT and internationally-bestselling author of children's books, which include the NEED series, FLYING series, TIME STOPPERS series, DEAR BULLY and other books. I like hedgehogs and puppies and warm places. I have none of these things in my life.
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