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people
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Ingredients
- 1.25 cups brown jasmine rice or long-grain brown rice, rinsed
- 1 tbsp coconut oil
- 1 cup chopped, white onion
- 1 TBSp finely grated fresh ginger
- 3 cloves garlic less if you aren't into garlic, you vampire
- 1 whole red pepper sliced into skinny 2-inch long strips
- 1 whole yellow pepper sliced into skinny 2-inch long strips
- 1 cup carrots peeled, diagonally sliced into ¼-inch thick
- 2 tbsp red curry paste
- 14 ounces coconut milk full-on fatty kind
- .5 cup water
- 1.5 cup kale thinly sliced
- 1.5 teaspoons sugar
- 1 tbsp soy sauce
- 2 tsp lime juice
- pinch of salt
Ingredients
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Instructions
- Cook that jasmine rice. Worry that it isn't the right rice. Worry you aren't the right writer to cook it. Boil it in a pot of water for 30 minutes. Don't let it overflow like your 197,000-word picture book about anarchy.
- Drain. Put it back in the pot. Let it rest for 10 minutes or more. Fluff it up when it's time. All works need a good fluffer.
- Wonder how you can possibly chop 196,000 words out of your brilliant picture book so that it's the appropriate publishing-industry 'approved' length. Sob as you put a big skillet on medium heat.
- When it's hot, add the oil. Wonder if you can even judge this if you can't manage to cut a mere five words out of your picture book, the ABC's of ANARCHY.
- Throw in the onion, some salt. Stir a lot. Stir for 5 minutes. Cry. Why do no publishers understand that children under three are indeed ready for your picture book and can read things that long and sustain attention.
- Add garlic, ginger, cook 30 seconds. Continue stirring.
- All you do is stir.
- The man is making you stir, isn't he? He also created those picture book rules.
- To heck with the man. You'll self publish it. You don't need to cut or revise. You don't need the man.
- Put the peppers and carrots in. Cook for 5 minutes. Add curry past. Cook for two minutes
- Feel happy that you don't have to revise.
- Keep adding on words. I mean ingredients. Add kale, water, coconut milk, sugar. Keep stirring. Make it simmer and then lower that heat to keep it gentle but not too harsh. Just like the voice in your picture book. This should take between 5-10 minutes. You get to decide when it's ready. LOOK AT THAT POWER! Feel powerful. You are in charge of your destiny!
- Take it off the stove. Add soy sauce and juice. Add salt. If it's too mellow add more soy sauce. Serve it with that fluffy rice and rejoice!
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