Goat-hair unibrows and the strange things people do for beauty

Loving the Strange

00:00 / 01:05:14

This week’s episode of LOVING THE STRANGE is all about the things we do for beauty. These are things in history and now, right?

Because this world is weirdly obsessed with looking hawt and has been for a long time.

From CITI/IO it says,

“In Hollywood films, it is practically a given that female spies will look stunning, and female nuclear scientists will be attractive blondes. In this world, beauty is considered to be a peoples’ defining feature.
“People love to worship celebrities and buy magazines that show their ‘perfect bodies’ and ‘perfect lives’. This feeds an unrealistic expectation of what life is really like. Not everyone is a male or female model with flawless skin. Actually, many magazine photos are touched up by photographers to remove blemishes and spots.”

They go on to say that attractive people can spend up to a third of their income maintaining their looks.

In a 2006 article, “Examining a society obsessed with appearance,” Kathryn Masterson writes,

“Last year, Americans spent $9.4 billion on cosmetic surgery, according to the American Society of Plastic Surgeons. More than 10 million cosmetic procedures were performed in 2005, including 3.8 million Botox injections. Cosmetic surgery is so common it has branched over to entertainment: A host of plastic-surgery shows, including “Extreme Makeover,” “Dr. 90210” and “The Swan,” allow us to watch the unattractive (or those who simply feel that way) pursue an ideal of physical attractiveness.

So, let’s talk about some of the weirdness:

TANNING

You know it’s weird that we try to change the color of our skin despite the whole skin-cancer issue.

And even before now and the time of spray tans (to avoid the sun-induced cancer) people would paint their legs too. During WWII especially when there wasn’t any pantyhose or nylon out there.

THE OPPOSITE OF TANNING

In Europe in those horrible Middle Ages, it was the thing to have pale skin because if you weren’t pale that meant you went outside and if you went outside? Well, that meant you were a peasant. Rich people did NOT work in the sun.

So to make that difference even more obvious, some would get some leaches and bleed out a bit to get that almost-dead look of vampires. Yay rich people? Using that money wisely.

Cough.

Things haven’t changed much.

WHITE TEETH AND BLACK TEETH

In Japan for a bit, military commanders’ daughters would have their teeth blackened with a lacquer made from taking vinegar and dissolving iron in it.

Eventually, the practice expanded and it was the aristocrats. And then those of us commoners had it for special occasions. It eventually was banned, but I’m not sure why.

It wasn’t just Japan though. Queen Elizabeth of England’s past had nasty teeth, black and naturally so because she ate too much sugar and didn’t have Crest, I guess. So, all these other ladies blackened their teeth to look wealthy and pretend like they had eaten tons of expensive sugar products just like the queen.

THE COD PIECE

Because we all want to pretend like there’s a giant kielbasa down there.

THE TAPE WORM

Because being skinny is worth parasites, meningitis and epilepsy.

BUTT IMPLANTS

Once, someone hacked my Amazon account and ordered butt padding. Honestly, I could use this, but they weren’t sending it to my house.

HOBBLE SKIRT

Because who doesn’t want their legs bound together?

NO HAIR

Everyone wanted lovely oval shapes back in the 1300s in Europe again. So they plucked a lot of their hair out at the top of their head. Then they got into it on their eyebrows. And then the church said, “STOP IT! WE ARE MAKING THIS A MORTAL SIN!”

Mortal sins are bad. You’re cutting off god’s sanctifying grace until you confess. But hey! You’re fashionable, right?

LARD HAIR

Well, not hair, but wigs. Back in Europe again, they wore some super massive wigs made out of wood frames. The paste on the frame? It was lard.

And that made some issues with rats.

Rats like lard.

So, when people took off their hair, rats would go on in and have brunch, or a late night snack and party down. So they invented wig cages and the term “rat’s nest.”

URINE MOUTHWASH

Apparently, some Ancient Romans would get their teeth white by making a mouth rinse with urine and it had to be from the Portuguese. We, allegedly had the strongest urine in the world. It was the ammonia, my friends. Or maybe the cod?

TOOTH INLAYS

According to Bust. Com, Ancient Mayans drilled holes into their teeth so that they could have jeweled inlays. Snazzy.

THE GOAT HAIR UNIBROW, OR JUST THE UNIBROW

Untouched eyebrows? In Ancient Greece, it meant you were pure. If you were like Carrie and had scant eyebrows, then you filled it in.

A unibrow meant you were a beautiful smartypants.

And they’d go to great lengths to get that look. How great? Imagine making fake eyebrows out of goat hair and then sticking them on with tree resin.

RESOURCES

https://citi.io/2020/07/29/reasons-why-people-are-obsessed-with-beauty/

https://www.chicagotribune.com/news/ct-xpm-2006-10-29-0610280136-story.html

https://www.healthyway.com/content/beauty-trends-in-america-that-seem-weird-to-other-cultures/

https://bust.com/style/15479-tk-totally-weird-beauty-trends-in-history.html

Bizarre Facts About Strange Historical Beauty Practices

17 Incredibly Disturbing Beauty Trends From History

https://www.cosmopolitan.com/health-fitness/advice/a3634/anal-bleaching-trend/

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Author: carriejonesbooks

I am the NYT and internationally-bestselling author of children's books, which include the NEED series, FLYING series, TIME STOPPERS series, DEAR BULLY and other books. I like hedgehogs and puppies and warm places. I have none of these things in my life. View all posts by carriejonesbooks

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I’ve worked with Carrie on multiple novels and she is a wonderful mentor! She is a great teacher and provides excellent feedback with examples, allowing me to learn and grow as a writer. She usually responds with feedback quicker than the agreed time, which is always nice. The best thing about Carrie though is that she is so encouraging. Sometimes it’s hard to have your work critiqued, but Carrie makes it easy. She is so good at heaping on praise while also giving constructive feedback, so it makes you excited to revise, rather than want to give up. I highly recommend her!

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EXPLORE YOUR STORY’S SOUL

It is a blessing Carrie is willing to share her insights and talents with others, because she is a powerhouse of a coach who pushes you to be the best writer you can be. There were times where I was so frustrated with my novel I felt like quitting, and Carrie pulled me from the bog of eternal revisions and dead-ends into a place of hope. She invigorated me to write and write better. Carrie inspired my growth as a writer and a person. She showed me it’s okay (actually, it’s great) to embrace my quirkiness. She tore down walls I didn’t know I had built and gave me the foundation to be a confident writer with direction.

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I could not more strongly recommend Carrie as a writing coach, because she cares fiercely about your writing, works tirelessly to improve your story, and nurtures you as a writer. She is the coach, the cheerleader, and the team all in one. If you want to get out of your rut or become a better writer, Carrie is the person you want to have by your side.

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Shrinks Fear

Carrie has a gift of encouragement in its truest sense–she searches for what is good in a writer and grows it, she provides perspective that shrinks fear back to size, and she nourishes the kind of confidence and hope so vital for a creative work. Even her criticism is gently done. She is also unfailingly funny! Her comments keep discussions fun and light and create a safe space for people to share and grow. It is clear that she cares and wants our books to succeed.

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Gentle Encouragement and an Occasional Kick in the Pants

One of the things I enjoyed the most about working with Carrie is that she helped me write the book I wanted to write, not the book she would have preferred I write, or the book she would written in my place. She was vested in helping me express my vision as a writer and as a human being.

One special thing about Carrie as a writing coach and teacher is her understanding of writing psychology. She’s well familiar with the pits of uncertainty and the swamps of despondency a writer can step into, and seems to know just the right thing to say to get the struggling person going again, from gentle encouragement to straight-ahead course correction to even the occasional kick in the pants.

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As a coach and support person, she was phenomenal. I greatly appreciated Carrie’s enthusiasm towards me and the other students. She took the time to know each of us. She was positive and uplifting in her messages, and funny, too!

Carrie is also a skilled writing teacher, honing in on the subtlest of details while also keeping the big picture of the story in view. She found the deficits in my story and was able to provide suggestions for solutions without being negative. She understands the difficulty writers encounter in this business and is always ready to help–whether by lifting our spirits or providing resources. I enjoyed having Carrie as my coach and I would highly recommend her to other writers.

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I was in the Write. Submit. Support class from The Writing Barn that was led by Carrie, and it was exactly what I needed. I’ve worked with a lot of different writing teachers and mentors in college classes, my MFA program, a playwriting apprenticeship, and various workshops and residencies, and Carrie was by far one of the best. Her feedback on my writing was extremely helpful but also encouraging and uplifting. She gave us a lot of thought-provoking and beneficial information in the monthly classes that helped me to see my writing from a different perspective. Every month, after our classes or after I received notes from her, I was inspired not only to write and improve my craft but to create in general–to write fiction, to write songs, to write plays, and to write content that would help other creative people and artists.

I also love how supportive Carrie is. She takes the time to really listen to you, encourage you, and support you, no matter where you are in your writing career or what your goals are. I also appreciate that she understands that everyone’s publishing path is different, and I was so grateful that I could turn to her for advice and support as I had to make some difficult decisions about my own career. I miss WSS now that the class is ofter, but fortunately, Carrie continues to produce informative and uplifting content for creatives every day–from her blog posts to her podcasts to her motivational thoughts posted alongside adorable dog photos on social media–and she inspires me to do the same. For anyone looking for a writing mentor/teacher/coach, I can’t recommend Carrie enough.